The Neon W

Behind the name: The Neon W

The scarlet letter: a scarlet A worn as a punitive mark of adultery; from Nathaniel Hawthorne’s novel The Scarlet Letter (1850).

Instead of a scarlet letter A upon my chest, in September 2021 when I became a widow at the age of 30, I felt like I had a glowing, neon W buzzing above my head. Instead of looks of hatred and shame, I received looks of pity, pain, and confusion. I loathed that W word. Widow? At 30? Bleh. I had a meal train planned for two solid months. People continued to drop off gifts for me and my kids. After receiving one particularly large, anonymous check, I felt unworthy of the generosity and attention and that the Church was doing too much for me, I’d really be fine! It was at that time I was drawn to the Word, and there I was wrapped in the warm embrace of Truth. I’d never noticed before how serious God took widowhood and widow care.

I’ve been fortunate to go through this journey with the hope of Jesus, the care of the Church, and the love of an amazing village of friends and family. However, it was still a journey that I had to do on my own at times and a journey that has been full of pain. That pain has a purpose, that story isn’t just mine, and it’s time I share my story and bring glory to the One who has sustained me through it all.

I wanted to create this blog to serve as a community for those who are in the same “widow” club that no one asked to be in, as well as for the people who want to love them well. I’ll share my story, share my hope, share resources I’ve found for myself and for my kids, share practical tips for supporting your friends and family, and have some friends and guests add their stories along the way too!

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3 responses to “Behind the name: The Neon W”

  1. Daniel Avatar
    Daniel

    I never know what to say when it comes to my unwanted grief. I lost my love one, Hollie, on September 25, 2021! That day stopped my whole life as I, with my kids(they are all adults)lost their mother to COVID. I grief so much because I loved so much. My Hollie and I was about to embark on an “empty nest” journey well worth since we dedicated our lives to raise good kids. That journey is still an “empty nest” but now I journey without her by my side. It’s a lonely journey although I know that my faith in Jesus reminds me that HE still walks with me as I go through it.
    The biggest pain I feel is watching the faces of my children as they walk through their own grief. One that I did 30 years ago when I lost my mother when I too was young!

    To say it has gotten better is a myth, better is to say that I’ve learned to live and move forward.

    I hope this blog helps bring hope, healing and a bit of trying to make sense out of this all to any and all that are walking threw their grief. May you feel God’s presence throughout it all!

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. Mrsmelmall Avatar
      Mrsmelmall

      Thank you for sharing this! I’m so sorry for your loss, and you’re absolutely right, our sadness honors the importance and love of what was lost ❤️ thank you for joining this journey with me!

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      1. Daniel Avatar
        Daniel

        Your welcome. This is very new to me 🥹

        Like

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